Thread:Deathstalker666/@comment-1496755-20180827202615/@comment-3547390-20190215144421

I am not sure it is so blatantly told to others, but I know it was told directly to me, which is definitely good as I am horrible with social conventions. I think I also have some of the greatest privacy in the company, everyone else has a window where they see people walk past or transparent cubicles. I have my own little remote corner, they even killed the light over here to make it dimmer for me. So mine is pretty much the opposite, plenty of privacy, but the noise is my biggest obstacle. I can drown it out with music since I am allowed to wear headphones, but listening to music for eight hours a day can be mentally exhausting.

In a way I guess the reason I am doing comic reading is for similar reasons. When I was younger comics were a lot harder to read since you needed the physical copies, so I could never really understand much of it because they would sort of expect you to have followed past storylines. Plus I never had much patience for that type of thing back then. I originally was just starting from the Silver Age of Marvel, but went back to Timely when I saw how many call-backs they were having. So far Spider-Man is by far the best, primarily due to well written limitations, as opposed to the overpowered nature of so many heroes.

It is insane to think about, but yes, we have come a long way. Now if only certain things didn't occur, like online expectations. GTA V, Skyrim, and Minecraft. Those are the most modded games since the days of Quake and Half Life. Yet there is a big difference between the two sets. The former requires a constant internet connection or at least some account verification, while the latter just works. GTA V I think requires Origin or something like that, Skyrim is entirely dependent on Steam, and Minecraft requires a valid account. Minecraft is the least of the evils, since it can be played in offline mode (with issues such as it downloading stuff from the cloud fixed by having the files on hand and not using the official client).

Piracy is ironically something highly positive for the industry. See, they store snapshots of files in much the same way as shovelware did in the past. Unlike the main game, the pirated version will never update, which means you get to play old versions that might be impossible to play in the auto-updating Skyrim or other steam titles. It also means you can get cracked versions that work without an internet account, which provides more long term security and will be highly important when the official route is no longer supported. Add to the fact that you have DRM and other security, piracy ends up being one of the only things being done to retain our history, admittedly in a more easy to eradicate format than shovelware was. I miss the days of physical media and when owning a game meant owning a game. And the saddest thing is that disks have a lifespan, meaning in time that physical media will cease to function as well. Note this means eventually things will be only by online distribution, yet of course many companies refuse to release copyright. Look at System Shock, existed for a bit online as it was abandonware, but then acquired by a company and everyone had to take it down. As insane as it sounds, copyright law is working at ends with gaming history, and the greatest acts of preservation will be through illegal transfers. Which is sad, because that means a lot less willing to save history, since you are risking your life for entertainment mediums. The fines and possible imprisonment from piracy are not worth the preservation. So that means hoping for essentially vigilantes to preserve to the best of their ability. And it will only get worse.

Just think of this. Megaupload was taken down due to copyright. It was brought back, but all those files are gone. Rapidshare is probably gone, Filestube is gone. Yes, these were often ways to transfer illegal content, because there is little way to determine what is and isn't legal through validation software. But it also resulted in the loss of possibly THOUSANDS of legal files, old mods or even really obscure games some indie creator uploaded without going through Steam. Now that developer is gone. Legally, you aren't supposed to upload that game. And yet, if that is done, that is one piece of history removed.

When you come down to it, there is going to be a massive "shit hit the fan" moment in the future. One where we have lost a lot of our past. Now, I assume the majority will just move forward and not care. But people like us, they will be the ones to suffer. This is the curse of not just being a blind consumer, of not just jumping to the latest pop fads. Life would be a lot easier if we just followed the masses and were constructions, for this world fights against us.

Really, you need to hope for people as crazy for me, to want to check out the obscure. We will have a million copies of Quake due to its relative popularity with fans of retro games. But who will protect the random shovelware levels from 1996? Not many, a small percentage at best, and as the years go on that number will just get smaller.

My father was abandoned by his father early on, so it is likely in him to never wish to abandon like that, thus the reason for the clingy nature. The rest of our family abandoned us, so really all we have is each other, and my father is averse to letting that go. I left for a few months to go with my mother, that destroyed him, he was barely able to function. I cannot even think about leaving, since I dare not hurt my father like that. A lot of people online cannot really understand that, they end up telling me how it is toxic to me and I need to get away as he doesn't provide the independence I need. But to leave would be essentially putting a death sentence on my father, he would blame himself and not be able to handle it. He can barely handle me going for walks and often ends up picking me up a short distance after I start.

Is it the healthiest, most ideal situation? Probably not. Does it probably contribute to my depression? It is possible. But I CANNOT leave. The stakes are just too high. And would leaving even help? I have a life where many things are provided for me, I am guaranteed few bills and relative luxury, with the only real issue being noise. Should I really turn away such a gift? It would be the equivalent of throwing away all your money to live on the street and be more "free" because you didn't have to work. Leaving could result in being in some apartment since I couldn't afford a house, likely with a noisy person living above or below me as most apartments have. This in turn means leaving would provide nothing but the freedom to do things myself (more obligations I didn't need to take) and would likely destroy the only remaining family I have.